Do as I say.. not as I do!

My husband worked from home today...GREAT! Actually NOT! The routine got totally disrupted and I seemed to want help with things I normally handle, just because he was home...

Do any of you SM's out there have a husband that works from home full time? Please tell me how you do it?

I love my husband but I really don't think I could handle him being around all day everyday as it would disrupt our routine too much....every family is different but we know our roles and responsibilities and it works (most of the time).

One thing my husband does take responsibility for most nights is the kids shower routine. Except today, seeing as he was home, I felt the showers could happen earlier and spent a good hour asking him to get our son in the shower.

I received various responses.."In a minute, I'll just finish this, Hang on, ok I'm coming blah blah blah" So.. our son is listening to all this whilst watching TV (I was cooking dinner with my daughter helping) and then all of a sudden my husband hops up and says "Ok shower time...NOW"

Our son replied with "Can I just...." and doesn't even get to finish before my husband again says "NOW" only this time he is shouting and sounding very angry :(

Now don't get me wrong, I am guilty of this myself, however it is always easier to see where others go wrong yet so hard to identify and then accept the same behaviours in ourselves.

What happened tonight just screamed a classic example of Do as I SAY, not as I DO!

Not only was I surprised by my husbands demand and feeling sorry for my little man...I also immediately felt inspired to write this post.

We certainly try our best like most other parents each day and aim to give the 5 minute warning before transitioning between tasks but why do adults sometimes do this to kids?

We feel its ok to say "hang on or in a minute" because we're doing something important to us yet at times we expect them to drop everything and do what we ask them to! Do we beleive what they are doing is not important? It might not be to us...but to them it is. Do we believe they should just fall into line and do as we say all the time, any time? I am not sure what it is....

I know right now we are under a little stress with coordinating a BIG move and my husband is tired from long long days commuting however is this a reason or an excuse?

Sometimes, I feel like my husband and I should be giving each other time outs to ask ourselves if we could have handled a situation better or differently...the way we do to our kids pretty often!

So is it really that hard to teach by example? To do as we want our kids to do? Do you think as parents we could take a leaf out of our own books and practice what we preach?

Sure we need to be responsible, productive adults and parents but at what cost? Sometimes we get so busy thinking about all we HAVE to do that we EXPECT our kids to understand our schedule and demands on our time...

I am not saying we should ignore our responsibilities in life and cater to every whim of our children. What I am saying is that we need to be aware of walking the talk. It can be hard to do but any change worth keeping is worth the effort.

Much of how we deal with our kids comes from our childhood. The important thing is when these type of situations occur, we don't beat ourselves up but we acknowledge we could have handled things differently and then try to make our next interaction with our kids a positive one.

I absolutely love a good quote and I think this one by C.G Jung sums up tonights message perfectly...


“If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves.” - C.G. Jung