Collaboration not Competition...

Surprise! I just had to do another post as I have just finished reading a book that I think every mother should read.... Mama Mia, A memoir of mistakes, magazines and motherhood by Mia Freedman.

For those who are not magazine junkies (or ex) Mia Freedman became the editor of Cosmo at just 24 yrs old and I could totally relate to her back in those days...until that is I became a mother at the same age she became an editor and her life seemed a world away from mine...Goodbye Cosmo, Hello Practical Parenting!

So imagine my surprise, 8 yrs later when I notice her book in borders (because of the fabulous cover :) and happen to flick to the page where she writes about losing her baby girl at 19 weeks gestation... WHAT? hang on, Mia Freedman doesn't have kids...or does she????? SOLD, EFTPOS, NO I DON'T NEED A BAG THANKS, GIVE ME MY BOOK AND A VANILLA LATTE PLEASE!

So here I am 6 days later and have just finished the book. I am writing no more about the details inside because I would love for you all to read it yourselves. What I will say is that by reading this book, you will begin to realise that it is OK to feed your kids cereal for dinner occasionally and much much more. It is even more OK to ADMIT it... (BTW breakfast for dinner appears every so often in our household!)

Motherhood is a tough gig and no 2 women will navigate it in the exact same way. So why not talk about what works for you and what doesn't with other mothers? You will undoubtedly learn something that may just work for you and probably realise that you are having thoughts or feelings that another mother is having too!

Yet not many women do this...we pretend that everything is great, that we have it all together when in fact we don't. We refrain from telling it like it really is for fear of being judged or because we believe that every other mother has it together. With good reason too, how many times have you had a discussion on breastfeeding, or circumcision or whether your child is sleeping through the night or not and felt as though every way other than the way you did it was right?

You see motherhood should be about COLLABORATION not COMPETITION. Why are we sooooo judgemental of one another? As Mia suggests, we all have our SMUG lists (things we know we do well as mothers) and our CRAP lists (things we don't do so well) so why don't we admit this to one another in order to know that IT'S ALL OK!

Let's encourage one another and the next time you're having difficulty or a crappy day...tell it like it is, don't pretend, embrace it, sit with it for a moment, don't be quick to feel better (and don't be quick to judge if you are listening)....yet don't get all worked up either; instead simply feel the emotion, find the lesson, then move on.

I encourage you all to buy the book, take some time to yourself, have a good laugh (and possibly a cry) and enjoy reading about a celebrity who admits to struggling to keep all the balls in the air just like the rest of us (oh and to having a muffin top too, go Mia you make us proud). Mama Mia is Mia's story so far.....motherhood is better off for her sharing it.

Like Mia, we all have a story too so lets share it and begin to rid motherhood of negativity and competition, afterall we can be our own worst enemies! We are all doing fabulous jobs even if it often doesn't feel like it and it is high time we started telling each other and more importantly... OURSELVES!

Thanks Mia for your book and for inspiring this post!